Slow baby - why and what to do?

Every mother loves her child. But even parents with angelic patience can get annoyed when the child does not have time to get ready for school every morning, does homework until night, moves barely. It is generally accepted that slowness is a flaw that needs to be fixed. But is it really so?

The reason is phlegmatic

Slowness is the main sign of phlegmatic temperament. It is difficult for people of this type to switch from one type of activity to another, as a result of which the actions that other people take a couple of minutes stretch for an hour among phlegmatic people. If the true reason for slowness is really in temperament, then parents probably could observe the first manifestations as early as preschool age, when the kindergartner could not get dressed on his own, tangled in his own sleeves.

At school, phlegmatic symptoms intensify. This often ends with the fact that the child switches to any one subject for which he has excellent marks. But the remaining disciplines are clearly lame: the student simply does not have time for them. The same thing with circles - in their free time, phlegmatic people rarely devote themselves to several activities.

What are the benefits
Temperaments are not divided into good and bad, and phlegmatic people have hidden virtues. Often, slowness goes hand in hand with thoughtfulness, a calm nature and flexibility of thinking. Growing up, such children will not make hasty decisions, and make superficial conclusions. Their energy will be directed to development in the sphere that interests them, allowing them to succeed.

Ways to accelerate
In no case can you force a smoked child to forcibly do something faster. Even worse, when the parent threatens punishment for failure to perform some actions within the specified period, even if they do not require it at all. Such "kicks" will not give the desired result, but only lead to the fact that the child will become isolated or embittered. But in the future, the child will face the fact that he will have to learn self-discipline and time planning. And to make this process less painful, you can set the stage for him now. There are special exercises in order to disperse the hoof.

1. Timer. Having plunged into any occupation, the child can sit behind him for hours. He does not notice how time is running out, and his strength is exhausted. In order to prevent this, set a timer on the watch and arrange with the child that he should take a break when the watch rings. Set the number of calls after which the time to complete the action expires. The watch should not be in front of the student right in front of his eyes. It is better if they are placed somewhere on the side. The child will not be distracted by them, but he will be able to see how much time he has left. For the fact that he will meet the deadline, be sure to reward him with something. Even a single sweetness or a small increase in pocket money will be a powerful motivation to accelerate internal rhythms.
2. Racing with the school. Due to the fact that phlegmatic people are difficult to get used to the new school year, in the first month of study, he will lag behind the curriculum. In such a situation, the best solution would be to buy textbooks in the summer, so that the child can familiarize himself with what lies ahead, and prepare for this. The advantage of such classes is that in the summer a student has a lot of free time. He will be able to reread one paragraph as many times as he wants. And then he, perhaps, will light up with a sincere interest in learning and with the beginning of classes he will be happy to demonstrate his knowledge.When a person is engaged in what he is doing well, it gives a desire to continue the business without leaving him halfway.
3. Competitions. Phlegmatic is difficult to drag into any section, because he is not used to wasting time on such things. But what if the circle would include a competitive element? Running, swimming, skiing - all this not only develops a desire to overtake an opponent, but also develops a physical form. Sport gives self-confidence and helps to make new friends in the team.

If not temperament - then what?

Not always a phlegmatic character is the cause of slowness. In some cases, the main role is played by the banal lack of concentration, when the child is distracted by any trifle and leaves the session in the middle. It can be played with nearby objects instead of doing homework. Or sit on your smartphone during school fees.

In this case, a conversation with the child about his future will help. We must show him the consequences of a good study and composure. In no case should you intimidate him with phrases like: “You’ll be a loafer - you will grow into a homeless man!” It will only cause fear, and fear always leads aggression. Better ask your child who they want to become and what they want. Do not get into spatial philosophical thoughts about the mind - let it be an easy conversation about simple desires like a big house or a strong family. Show that you appreciate his views and help him on his way to a dream, but, first of all, the child must make his own efforts.

In another case, slowness is the result of a fear of making a mistake. The child is so afraid of responsibility for the wrong result that he prefers to do nothing at all - the fear of appearing stupid is much stronger than the fear of being branded as lazy. Sometimes this is caused by innate character traits and a sincere desire for the ideal. But most often this fear is formed under the influence of threats from parents. Punishment for a deuce or poorly washed dishes completely discourage the desire to do something next time. Therefore, it is worth looking at your own behavior from the side and try to correct it.

By the way, about anxieties - stress often leads to a decrease in alertness and composure. Perhaps the child suffers from those events that you knew about, but did not consider as worthwhile. Children react to everything more sharply than adults. This does not mean that it is worth rushing around the child for any reason, surrounding him with his relentless supervision.

A heart-to-heart conversation is where the solution to most problems begins. Ask the child how his days go, what his mood is. No need to arrange an interrogation if he refuses to make contact. Just let him know that he can always count on your support and share his feelings.

Video: slow-moving baby - what to do?